Sunday, January 26, 2014

Irish Medical Dictionary

Reproduced from somewhere for your enjoyment


 
 Irish Medical Dictionary


Artery: The study of paintings
Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria.
Barium: What you do when patients die.
Benign: What you be, after you be eight.
Caesarean Section: A neighborhood in Rome.
Cat-scan: Searching for Kitty.
Cauterize: Made eye contact with her.
Colic: A sheep dog.
Coma: A punctuation mark.
Dilate: To live long.
Enema: Not a friend.
Fester: Quicker than someone else.
Fibula: A small lie.
Impotent: Distinguished, well known.
Labour Pain: Getting hurt at work.
Medical Staff: A Doctor's cane.
Morbid: A higher offer.
Nitrates: Cheaper than day rates.
Node: I knew it.
Outpatient: A person who has fainted.
Pelvis: Second cousin to Elvis.
Post Operative: A letter carrier.
Recovery Room: Place to do upholstery.
Rectum: Nearly killed him.
Secretion: Hiding something.
Seizure: Roman emperor.
Tablet: A small table.
Terminal Illness: Getting sick at the airport.
Tumour: One plus one more.
Urine: Opposite of you're out.

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Senior moments

As I was lying around, pondering the problems of the world, I realized that at my age I don't really give a rat's ass anymore. If walking is good for your health, the postman would be immortal. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, but is still fat. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years, while a tortoise doesn't run and does mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years. And you tell me to exercise?? I don't think so. Just grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, the good fortune to remember the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference. 

Now that I'm older here's what I've discovered:

1.. I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

2.. My wild oats are mostly enjoyed with prunes and all-bran.

3.. I finally got my head together, and now my body is falling apart.

4.. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

5.. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

6.. If all is not lost, then where the heck is it ?

7.. It was a whole lot easier to get older, than to get wiser.

8.. Some days, you're the top dog; some days you're the lamppost.

9.. I wish the buck really did stop here; I sure could use a few of them.

10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents.

11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids.

12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.

13. The world only beats a path to your door when you're in the bathroom.

14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he'd have put them on my knees.

15. When I'm finally holding all the right cards, everyone wants to play chess.

16. It's not hard to meet expenses . . . they're everywhere.

17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter . . .I go somewhere to get something, and then wonder what I'm "here after".

19. Funny, I don't remember being absent-minded.

20. HAVE I SENT THIS MESSAGE TO YOU BEFORE..........??? 


Saturday, December 28, 2013

Public rest rooms


If you're anything like me, you probably hate using public rest
rooms. Of course, sometimes we have no choice, so whats the 'safest'
way to spend a penny in public?

After analyzing a total of 51 public restrooms, experts found that
the stall that consistently had the least bacteria was the one that
is closest to the door. This stall also consistently had the most
toilet paper!

It was assumed that people avoid the first stall as they want
privacy, so they select a stall that is further away from the door.

Tests also show that when a toilet is flushed, a fine mist that
contains contagious bacteria sprays up out of the bowl. This mist
can lead to intestinal bugs and you could even catch hepatitis from
it... So it's a very good idea to stand before you flush!

Now you know - Use stall 1 and stand up before flushing and you
should avoid any nasties.
Tri Nature - Environmentally Responsible Household Products

Friday, October 25, 2013

ADHD Awareness Month



I received this email and thought it a very worthy cause to support, please check it out..



Hi Ian,

We're celebrating ADHD Awareness Month because the most important thing for families affected by ADHD is AWARENESS.

Awareness that there is now an effective and safe natural alternative to taking questionable ADHD medication.

It's called The ADD/ADHD Transformation Program.

It's a simple 3 step program that guides you through the Traditional Chinese Medical approach to treating Attention Deficit Disorder by making simple changes in your lifestyle, home and in your child's life.

These 3 steps can be followed by anyone, no matter where you live or what your situation is. This program was developed for families, parents and therapists to follow online using the power of the internet.

It was developed by a traditional Chinese medical doctor, Dr. Blaise T. Ryan, after he used this 3-step ancient Chinese formula to overcome his own personal problem with ADHD.

And from now until Halloween,
SAVE 50% on The ADD/ADHD Transformation Program

Hurry! ADHD Awareness month ends on Oct. 31st, and so does this 50% Discount on the entire program. Click on this link:

ADHD Awareness Month Special
SAVE 50% on The ADD/ADHD Transformation Program


Happy Halloween!

The Parent Learning Club

Home of Democratic Parenting

P.S. We're looking for Parent Leaders! If you work with kids or parents, or simply want to deepen your own understanding about child-adult relationships and communication, then this 5-week Parent Leadership Training may be for you. Click here to learn more: Parent Leadership Certification Training

P.P.S. Did you watch the Online Webinar on: Discipline Without Punishments or Rewards?

Check out this Exclusive Parent Learning Club Webinar about how you can get kids to listen, pay attention and cooperate without raising your voice, losing your mind or freaking out. Click here to access the Democratic Discipline Webinar.

Parent Learning Club P.O. Box 1418 Sarasota, Florida 34230 United States




--

"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
" - Maya Angelou


Life is an Adventure'

Life is an Adventure on IBS

Saturday, September 21, 2013

Self Help - Why We Experience Pain And Why It Can Be Good For Us


Why Is There Pain And Suffering In Life?

Humans can be strange creatures. It is often only through
pain and suffering that we take the time to really get to
know ourselves and make changes in our life. Many of us also
do not value things that are too easily achieved, i.e. that
we get without pain.

Pain is an inevitable part of life. If, however, you are
choosing to walk the high road (rather than the low road),
you will be minimizing the amount of pain and suffering you
would otherwise experience as you voluntarily choose to
learn your lessons before the pain becomes so great that you
are forced to.

So why do we have pain in our lives? Your conscious and your
unconscious (or soul) will give you very different answers
to this question.


How Your Conscious Mind Sees Pain

If we are honest, most of us see suffering as something
unpleasant to be endured or avoided. We see the better times
in life to be those when we are experiencing harmony,
contentment and happiness. When we are content, however, we
do not feel the need to search for answers. The times in
life that make us grow and give us the depth to our
character are not those times spent in harmony, contentment
and happiness, but rather those time spent in adversity. In
the same way that a baby who continued to lie quietly and
contently on a rug would never learn to crawl and then walk,
so it is for us. It is the times of frustration and pain
that move us forward and help us to grow.

There are times in most lives, when we feel we cannot endure
what life is throwing at us. During those times I remind
myself that I chose this life and I would not have chosen
things I did not believe I could endure or grow from.

How Your Soul Sees It

Your soul or unconscious sees pain and suffering as the
opportunity for healing, growth and understanding. Struggle
is natural to growth. In the same way that metal is made
stronger each time it is returned to the fire and then
struck on the anvil, so too are you made stronger each time
you endure adversity. Eventually the suffering and pain
fades and you are left with the gifts that are their legacy.


Although you have designed this lifetime in advance, while
you are here you still have the power of freewill.
Unconsciously, you can choose whether or not you will
experience some of the suffering you had planned to help you
with your growth.

This is illustrated in a story told by a subject in The
Journey of Souls by Michael Newton. In the story a little
girl chose to live a life where she could help others to
learn. To ensure she did this, she chose at the age of 8 to
fall out of a carriage and land beneath its wheels. As a
result of this accident, she suffered immense pain in her
legs and was crippled for the rest of her life.

Living and coping with the pain gave her powers of
concentration above and beyond those experienced by other
people. She used these powers of focus later in life to
become an inspirational teacher. The fact that she was bound
in a wheelchair meant she lived a life focused more upon
mental and emotional rather than physical skills as she had
deliberately unconsciously chosen to remove them from that
lifetime. The very thing that seemed to be such a tragic
event was the very thing that in the end meant she would
become successful in her chosen career and ensure her
personal growth.

While in a trance state the subject was able to explain the
unconscious moment of choice she experienced before she
continued to play with the carriage door until it opened.
She knew that she could stop playing with the door and avoid
falling out of the carriage and becoming crippled. She knew
that if she did this, she would still have a good life, but
she wouldn't experience the same level of personal growth
and neither would she serve others to the same degree.

Find The Positive In Your Pain

As difficult as it sounds, there is reason to be positive
about your pain and suffering. As a friend said to me while
I was recovering from surgery, "Embrace the pain it means
you are alive". Although at the time I wanted to say rude
and sarcastic things to him, in hindsight I came to find the
truth in his words. Those times you are experiencing pain in
life are also the times that you are growing and learning
the fastest.

In every situation, look for the learning you can get from
it. Once you have it, the pain generally ceases. Gain the
growth and cease the pain. If the pain continues, it is a
good indication that there is still something for you to
'get' (a lesson or understanding) from the experience.



Lifetime Health Natural Supplements - Quality- Purity - Integrity
--
"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - Maya Angelou

Life is an Adventure'
Life is an Adventure on IBS

Saturday, September 7, 2013

Make Your Own Brain Boosting Snack


Feeling tired at work? Or just feeling mentally
drained by mid-day...

Before you reach out for a coffee the next time, try
this snack to fight off poor concentration and low
energy levels instead:
     Brain Boosting Snack - 1 cup walnuts
- 1/2 cup pine nuts
- 1/4 cup sesame seeds
- 1/2 cup pumpkin seeds
- 1/3 cup of dried goji berries
- 1/2 cup dried apricots

Pack in a sealed container or resealable bag to
preserve freshness.

The above snack is rich in essential fatty acids,
proteins and a healthy amount of carbohydrates.




--
"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." - Maya Angelou

Life is an Adventure'
Life is an Adventure on IBS

Monday, August 5, 2013

Drink green tea, get less cancer


A long list of studies confirms that green tea drinkers generally get less cancer.
 

When researchers at Chung Shan Medical University in Taiwan, analyzed the diets of people with lung cancer and those without, they found that, for smokers, drinking green tea lowered the cancer risk by a factor of more than 12. Overall, among smokers and non-smokers, green tea was shown to lower lung cancer risk by 500 percent.2

Scientists at the Vanderbilt-Ingram Cancer Center have shown that green tea lowers women’s risk of developing digestive system cancers, especially cancers of the stomach/esophagus and colo-rectum.3

"For all digestive system cancers combined, the risk was reduced by 27 percent among women who had been drinking tea regularly for at least 20 years," says Vanderbilt researcher Sarah Nechuta. "For colorectal cancer, risk was reduced by 29 percent among the long-term tea drinkers. These results suggest long-term cumulative exposure may be particularly important."

The Best way to Drink Green Tea

To protect your health, the best way to drink green tea is with lemon juice (or take vitamin C at the same time) and just a touch of sugar. Studies at Purdue show that consuming vitamin C (it’s in the lemon juice) and sucrose along with green tea can triple your absorption of green tea’s helpful catechins.4

It’s not often that one sees any benefit to eating sugar. In fact, this is the first time I’ve seen such a benefit reported. I’m a bit skeptical. It’s probably the lemon juice-green tea combo that’s so beneficial. But I guess we can allow ourselves a teensy amount of sugar :-)


To your health



GreenTeaX50


GreenTeaX50 - Do you want to lose weight? Want to improve your health? Need help to burn body fat? GreenTeaX50 can help you with everything from weightloss to wellbeing and everything in between including inner health and the appearance of youth and vitality. Each great tasting serve of GreenTeaX50 packs the fat burning antioxidants of over 10 cups of regular green tea to help stimulate metabolism, assist fat oxidation and promote thermogenesis to help burn body fat.

    No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.

― Buddha

Friday, July 12, 2013

Maintain Your Daily Motivation


We all have to work, every day. We may go to work at an office, or maybe our career allows us to work from home. No matter the situation, we all have daily responsibilities.

So why not make the experience pleasant, productive and satisfying? By keeping your chin up and not getting too frustrated with temporary setbacks, you can maintain a positive can-do attitude. Here are 5 ideas to keep you motivated.




1) Don't skip a meal
Stopping to eat lunch is NOT a waste of time, but a necessary break to help you re-energize.

2) Schedule time for fun
Schedule some fun things to do throughout the day. Enjoy a cup of coffee and read a few pages of a book, or take a brisk walk outside and enjoy the outdoors.

3) Steer clear of naysayers
Avoid those people who bring you down. Surround yourself with energetic and enthusiastic people, the individuals who make you feel wonderful.

4) Start an exercise program
Find a friend or co-worker to exercise with. It could be a walk during your lunch hour, OR meeting your friends at the gym before or after work. When you know you look good and you feel good, you're going to be motivated throughout the entire day!

5) Find solutions to problems
Don't let an obstacle bring you down, find a solution to the problem and get yourself back on track.
Motivation is not present by chance or luck...it's by you doing what it takes to keep yourself full of energy and yearning for great things!


    Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.

― Thomas A. Edison


Calm.com.au

Sunday, June 2, 2013

Help with Sleep.



How you feel during your waking hours 
relies on how well you sleep. 







WARNING: Do not watch this video in public. Multiple people have reported instantly falling asleep.

How you feel during your waking hours relies on how well you sleep.

Similarly, the cure for sleep difficulties can often be found in your daily routine. Your sleep schedule, bedtime habits, and day–to–day lifestyle choices can make an enormous difference to the quality of your nightly rest.


The Dormio App will help you optimise your sleep so you can be productive, mentally sharp, emotionally balanced, and full of energy all day long.

Get Dormio at http://DormioApp.com/

Love it...

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Help our kids..

Childhood anxieties can haunt us our entire lives.  

They can grow into insecurities, relationship issues, addictions, patterns of self-sabotage, depression, and affect every aspect of our adult life.
It's been said that there are only 3 motivations in life:
1. Ambition
2. Fear
3. Love

Of all of these *fear* is the most prominent in our world today.
*Ambition*has it's limitations and can easily corrode honesty and

compassion.  And in
most cases, ambition itself is usually fueled by a deeper fear.

*Love* is the only one that leads to deep lasting fulfillment.
*Love* is the only one that never compromises integrity and sincerity.
*Love* has no ulterior motives and casts away the shadow of fear.

Children were made in love and are living embodiments of love.
No one teaches us about love better than our kids.

As parents our greatest desire is for our children to thrive and be happy.
When we see our children get caught in patterns of fear, it's
heart-breaking.  So how do we help children who are anxious, afraid,
hesitant, insecure or downright dysfunctional because they are caught in
the grip of fears?

How can we help toddlers, kids and teens who are struggling in the world
because of this?


There are many tips to assist with these issues on the Parenting Club website available.